Unintelligible Musings

These past few days have been miserable. No blog updates, no twitter updates, very few orkut logins and fewer gmail checks. The culprit: Some bloody darned virus thats been eating me from the inside. 

Sunday I come home get undressed n go in to the washroom n for a second everything blacks out. I'm fading in and out of consciousness. Kinda like..

"One minute you're on top 

The next you're not"

Only worse. I'm like a Valykyr induced Max Payne. Only Worse. Yes, I played that game n other puke-inducing 3D games where the surroundings turn instead of the character. Play Wolf 3D for 3 hours continuously n I am dayumm sure you'll throw up on your computer screen. 

Moving on to more mature stuff, Does it ever annoy you when u sit n text ur friends n this bugger next to you PEEPS into your mobile? They're not even discreet about it. They BLATANTLY PEEP into your mobile. N then there're some buggers who for no apparent reason wanna borrow your phone. Mobiles are like underwear. You don't borrow someone them. You don't wanna hold someone else's in your hand. You don't wanna use it. You definitely DONT wanna see what's inside it. It's personal. Would u peep inside someone's undie??

Speaking of Undie, I saw Rahman's video where there're people holding placards that say "Free Hugs". N no one objects. Let me tell you, Mr. Golden Globe, as much as we like that spirit, u'll unleash an era of neo-rapism in Chennai, where every bugger n every beggar will wanna hug every average looking chick n play your song. I would rather run naked with a placard that says "Chaddi" while u sing udo re udo re udo re :P I think the ULTIMATE musician is Shivmani. Look at this guy, he can make music out of anything from Trashcans to Spoons! 

I got a call from a "tech support" HR who spoke english like she was an Arab. She wants me to join the Microsoft tech support. American timing. Call center. 1.7 lac per annum. Do these folks know what I'm worth? I mean, this package has got MOST of the things I hate. Microsoft. America. BPOs. Low pays. Accents!! Why do these people HUNT me down? 

Heard the joke about Anees's birthday treat? The folks at anna university were so shocked that they decided to withhold his result. 

Trance and Tranquility

Groggy bloodshot eyes. Hangover. Smell of smoke. Crumpled covers. Pills on cabinet. Puke. Flush. Dress. Check mail. Go out. Look down on anything that walks. Nasty stares. Remarks. Hitting on babes. Public transport. Music over headset. Pull collar over ears. Doze off. Enter room. Make heads turn. Make heads turn again. Disgusted. Settle down. Take time. Hate. Everything. Peppy women. Sizzling girls. Babes. Hot chicks. Not so hot chicks. Filthy Romances. Roadside romeos. Bugged. Steal a nap. Lunch. Get kicked out. Meet the authorites. Fight power with silence. Quote Gandhi. Hide. Run. Celebrate Freedom. Foood. Cheap Hotel. Dirty Food. Houseflies. Broken eggs. Smelly food. On dirty Plates. Hog nonetheless. Quit midway. Hitch a ride. Pity fellow travellers. Smirk at couples on their way to cheap smelly motels. Pity fat single women. Hold hair. Get dust out of eye. Home Sweet Home. Loud neighbors. Pillow over head. Shut eyes. Force sleep. Attract sandman. Sound of Running feet. Same dream every time. Curse. Swear. Make a joke. Move on. Slack. Think. Stop. Run. Feed. Gape. Gawk. Catcall. Stare. Look away. Hoot. Shoot. Cheat. Beat. Shit. Chores. Errands. Lists. More Lists. Twirl Hair. Scratch private parts. Hit the sack. Rub the rug. Dream. Nightmare. Dancing Angel. Fiery Angel. Laugh. Cry. Listen. See. Try. Give up. Touch. Sweat. Blood. Tears. Drums. Lizards. Bright Lights. Sunlight. Kill ringing noise. Curse. Stare. Groggy bloodshot eyes. Loop. 

Fat Bitch

I know a lotta fat guys who're hep n cool. They wear jeans n black t shirts that has some metal band's name on it. They play games on PC or a playstation like maniacs. They have goatees. They have weird (read scary) eating and sleeping habits. N they are cool. Anish is almost there but not just yet.

He plays games. Only not like Mike Shinoda, he plays it more like a ten year old diagnosed with obsessive compulsive. The other day he was playing the puke-inducing max Payne at my place n I saw the way he twists his entire body to the left simply because he wants to do the same in the game when all he had to do was rotate the mouse n use the keyboard. N I saw the fervour with which he plays it. Imagine a guy who's willing to wake up at 2 to play a game that he's already completed years ago.

Anish is a movie buff n listens to a english music. Yes, thats what every other 20 year old does but whats different with anish is he goes through the pain of downloading them at twilight n then brings it to your place n sprays you with names like Clint Eastwood, Kurt Cobain, Al Pacino with his trademark "chance a illa da" expression while u are trying to comprehend what he's been telling you.
He gets excited by Clint Eastwood n Demi Moore. His definition of a GREAT movie is it's gotta be on top 250 on imdb's pathetic rating.

He's a regular at this Playstation place where everyone knows him by name. Everyone as in, the kids there and the guy who runs this shop. well not just playstation, Everyone in coll knows anish as a chubby guy. Everyone knows him. Even those HE doesn't know himself. Even if they never met. Obviously, the guys at Bakya know him too. The waiter, yesterday, politely inquired about his long-term absence (2 weeks) from bakya. He just smiles and lets it go. Yes, Anish does a very good impersonation of Johnny Depp (lol).

There's this dude in a safari suit at Bakya. I still cant decipher what his designation is. He gives you the food but he's not a waiter. Anyways, the point is, I've been to bakya with anees for ages n EVERYTIME we order somethin this safari guy brings the plate and places it in front of Anish, even if it was MY dish n MY money.

I remember this once, when he spoke for 30 minutes at a stretch about something called Ninja Robots, a cartoon show. He was explaining in great detail while I was drooling in my chair not even pretending to listen. He just went on and on and on and finally I was forced to ask:
"are u gonna tell me the story of the entire series??"
"No this is just the first episode. Wait I'll tell you what happens in the second.."
Now this is a feat if you ask me, considering the fact that an actual episode runs for only twenty minutes.

One thing I simply HAVE to mention is he's the most UNphotogenic person on earth. He does not look this sick in person and he manages to pull off the world's weirdest sick-smiles ever. Exhibit A.






Anish is nocturnal. His day starts at 2 AM when free download starts. If the guys at BSNL saw his december download graph, they'll bleed to death. 14 movies in a month. His current obsession is "That 70s show", which is as always "Chance a illa da". The greenish part of this graph depicts his free usage.



I actually promised this post would have somethin NICE bout anish or at the very least nothing dirty. So here goes HIS birthday present (yes I am not gonna buy him anything :D).

Anish is in the "Prime of lime" he's an uber-cool guy who u can hang out with for any amount of time. He loves to share whatever goodness he's got be it great movies or dumb sitcoms. Friends love Anish. Cuz inspite of his machine-gun-rapid-fire-inglees he's actually a nice guy. Girls (or should I say babes) consider him as a chubby-round-cherubic-cute-guy but I don know if thats good for him or not. He's suddenly health conscious that makes him wear jogging shoes n walk. His diet consists of pretending to hate eating at bakya. But on the whole, Anish is a great friend, a funny guy, a kewl-dude (he's promised to treat me at ascendas), n a great guy to hang out with. This one's for you A-cubed, GB(Gundu Badu/GetBackers), Yaana Kutty, Fat Bitch, Thevidiya Have a Happy Birthday.

These chicks don even know the name of my band

Disclaimer: This is not a comprehensive list. There're some bands I havent mentioned here. And I don't KNOW all of them here.

Okay so this one's been comin for a long time. Music. Western. Bands. Favorites. Likes. Dislikes. Here we go.

It all started in this particular era when watching MTV was considered "kewl" by all those loser folks in school n I tuned in to fake being a fan of BSB, Boyzone n Ricky Martin. Pathetic. I know.

The only proper band (this I know only in retrospect) was RHCP. But then I liked it only cuz it's video resembled a video game. Of course you HAD to LIKE Eminem even if you don't understand what it was all about cuz everyone seemed to be talking about it. The video back then made absolutely no sense to me. Pick of the lot

Ricky Martin Maria
Eminem The real slim shady
BSB Everybody, Show me the meaning
RHCP Californication
Limp Bizkit's MI song
This guy called Enrique I watche donly cuz he had a hot girlfriend n a coupla other songs I don't remember now.

My school farewell video was a 450 mb file. My friend was kind enough to fill the free space up with inglees music. And thus started my journey into actual inglees music.

Linkin Park. The now pop band was a raging hit back then and it was a new one as well. And their music was just mind blowing. You gotta gve it to them Meteora n Hybrid theory were wonderful. Best part was the songs were generally 2.5 to 3 minutes long. To put it in a friend's words

"LP is like a curtain, when you're into it, everything else seems like crap. Once you get out of it, LP seems like crap." 

Two things happened at this juncture, I realized my cousin had a complete eminem collection. And I was heartbroken when I heard rumours about LP breaking up. That's when I started listening to Jay Z and Fort Minor thanks to LP. For sometime, I was calling Fort Minor as Fort Knox. Pathetic. I know.

LP
Fort Minor
Jay Z
Avril (yes that girl too)

At this point every local bloke (read Galeej Guys) was talkin about LP, 50 cent, Eminem, Akon and was going "Yo Mamu". So I decided I dint wanna be one of these guys. That's when a friend suggested Greenday. My god, were they good or what? From there on I moved on to the likes of

Blink 182
Goo Goo Dolls
Hoobastank
Foo Fighters
Fountains of Wayne
Good Charlotte
Evanescence
Sum 41
Nickelback
Sugarcult
U2
Oasis
Papa Roach (thanks Smack down)
Maroon 5
The Rasmus
3 doors down
American Hi-fi
Nine Inch Nails
Godsmack
Akon
Black Eyed Peas
Snoop Dogg (thanks nfs)

This was the time when I was watching American Pie n the only period when I experimented with a LOTTA bands. N yes, Anees was the one who told me bout Good Charlotte. Once I grew out of those, I went on to

Korn
System of a down
Disturbed
Rage Against The Machine
Audioslave
RHCP (proper this time)

After I realized that those were mere noise making bands, I got into actual music.

Metallica
Iron Maiden
Nirvana
Slipknot
Gorillaz
AC/DC
AeroSmith

I've tried a couple of bands but never really liked them.

Guns n Roses
Black Sabbath
My Chemical Romance
Third Eye Blind
Three Days Grace
Radiohead
Led Zepplin
Def Leppard
50 cent (whatever the fuck does this guy mutter anyway?)

Some of the Bands I have passable knowledge of

Eric Clapton
Snow Patrol
Soundgarden
James Blunt
Incubus

Band on the list henceforth

Cranberries
Deep Purple
Sepultura
Alter Bridge (Thanks Anees)
Outcast
Alice in Chains
Arctic Monkeys
Switchfoot
Mudvayne

and some more prospects

Finger Eleven
Pearl Jam
nonpoint

Alright so that's that. It's been an awesome journey so far and am hoping to take it farther. N one thing I realized is that Quality always rules over quantity. It doesn matter how many bands u listen to, what matters is how many good songs you listen to. And right now I'm hoping to grow out of the mindset that one shouldn't listen to the likes of BSB, Pussycat dolls and stuff. If it sounds good, it should go on the playlist but that seems like a far shot.

So until I attain Nirvana, I shall slip not. I promise to go on no matter how disturbed I am. It doesn't matter if the backstreet boys chide me. I don't care if I'm marooned. I don't care if they make me turn into a deep shade of purple. I'll show them my finger eleven (:P) without batting an eyelid, without switching a foot. Their opinion is moot. It's a nonpoint. So if Eric clapped on or James was blunt, that wouldn't really bother me. They're all like Gorillas that drop a 50 cent into the radio head and give it a good smack simply because they don't understand AC/DC. Their rage against the machine is stupid. Me being the Iron Maiden, will not turn my third eye blind. I'll give them three days grace, feed them korn and make their days green. These bloody Arctic Monkeys don't understand that they are outcast for eating cranberries on my sound garden. I'm gonna drive nine inch nails into their head and make them my audio slaves. And I shall not rest until the foo fighters evanesce and leave the good charlottes alone.

Until next time this is Papa Roach signing off. Convey my regards to your metalli akka. Oh here's you nickel back. U2 take good care of yourself.

Is Nickelback Grunge or not?

Is Nickelback Grunge or not? Me n Anees had this altercation, where he said Nickelback is Altern Rock while I said it's grunge. I did a little wiki hunting n the Funny thing is, it managed to confuse me more than clarify the doubt (which is rare btw). 

According to wiki, Nickelback is post-grunge, which is a sub genre of Alternative Rock and Grunge. And I crawled through the links offered in the wiki and realized that what's even more confusing is that Grunge apparently is a sub genre of altern rock. Yeah right. Now that I found that totally useless, here're some quotes (for corroboration) which I shall follow up with some more explication.

• "Grunge is a subgenre of alternative rock" wiki Grunge
  
• "Post-grunge is a subgenre of alternative rock that emerged as a derivative of grunge music" Wiki Post-Grunge

Here're some quotes from a discussion forum on last.fm, the topic called Grunge Revival. This particular thread is called "NICKELBACK - GRUNGE OR NOT?"

Here're a few responses:

• "Just no. The music is corporate, shitty, post-grunge bullshit that's basically the same song remarketed every two years."
• "No, at least not according to what my concept of "grunge" is. Grunge isn't a sound, but if you're referring to grunge as a sound, you're only talking aboutGreen River as they were the first to be described with the term grunge. Now, with what I believe grunge really is, is any band that originated from Seattle, WA and the surrounding area. So, not only does this include the automatic "grunge" bands, but also bands such as Heart, Jimi Hendrix, Sleater-Kinney and Modest Mouse. Nickelback, however, does not fit either of those defintions."
  

Obviously that was of no help either. So here's my take on this issue. 

Nickelback IS grunge. 

What is Grunge? My definition of Grunge in general, as an art form, is when distortions, grubbiness and imperfection are used to make art. Say for example in the accompanying picture scratches, splats, blurs etc make for art.

(Digression: Grunge Photoshopping is a very interesting topic,that I suggest u follow to truly and clearly understand term Grunge better than by any other means)

Here's a web definition of Grunge as a word: "dirt: the state of being covered with unclean things" and if that is incorporated into a picture or a song, where it's deliberately made "dirty", or unclear u have gruge art. 

Urban Dictionary says tis about Grunge Music:

-Has a dirty guitar sound, strong riffs, and heavy drumming 
-Guitars usually tuned to a lower key 
-Commonly used guitar distortion and feedback 
-Draws heavily on Punk 
-Lyrics are typically angst-filled, angry, frustrated, sad, fearsome, and depressed 

In terms of music, it's angst filled lyrics, distorted and droning guitars, out-of tune vocals, gruff vocals and the like. In short, my definition of Grunge would be Nirvana's "When did you sleep last night" especally towards the end it is TRUE grunge in it's purest form. 

I don't know wtf this Post-grunge is or much of that technical shit, but let's discuss the case in hand. Nickelback "Someday" the lyrics, the way its sung, the pathos, the guitars, I truly feel Nickelback is Grunge.  

Exhibits: 

1. Someday
2. Too Bad
3. Shakin' Hands
4. Something in your mouth
5. Photograph

Here's the torrent for Complete Discography and their latest album Dark Horse. You may proceed to download if you accept that Anees was wrong n I was right. 

On the other hand, Alternative Rock is an all encompassing Genre that can be used to define any music that's non-conformist, which includes the likes of Disturbed and RATM and I for one definitely think RATM has very little to do with Nickelback. For starters, they're way better :P

Disclaimers:

1) I don't care if Grunge was a part of Alternative Rock, it defines Nickelback better than the other term Anees used

2) I don't really like Nickelback that much, but when it comes to an argument, I give it my all :P 

Omplite and Bulsas: Part II

This post involves some of those funny posters I managed to make a note of but wasn't in a position to click pictures of. 

1) Spring Role  - Apparently the role of spring is to bring in joy. As tasty as the spring roll was, I couldn't stop laughing over the way it was spelt till I had some of it coming out of my nose. 

2) Ladies Stitching Center - I know this one's almost there...but somehow just not there yet. A ladies tailoring center is understandable but a ladies stitching center seems interesting. Whats more? Change the order n u get a  BDSM version Ladies center stitching :P

3) Beef Rost - Yes they spell the words the way they are pronounced, similar to the Puncher shops in Chennai. 

4) The reason I don't have the fortune of posting pics was because it was a three hour drive n the bus was too fast for the kinda windy roads they had there at Kerala n I was busy holding on to whatever I could catch. There was this sign on the road that said "Driving fast Reduce life" definitely not hilarious but if you're into road safety n stuff u better not believe everything u read 

5) But the winner is not a poster but the guy who gave a television interview after the Mumbai attacks..definitely not the right time to be looking for such humour but I couldn't help it, this guy was just awesome..

"Yeh ek bahuth bada Dijashter hai...Unhone Masheen ka isthamaal kiya...Humprupper mejures lenge..abhi exhact phigures nahi maloom..Unka ideoloziesaisa hai"

The letters in bold are english btw. Part 1 can be read here.

What the fork? Tickers??

Turn on any channel n u r bound to see a ticker crawling on the bottom of your tv screen. It's either user-generated or the channel has its own crap-creation algorithms that churn out random text. 

What irks me is the purpose of these tickers. If anything, only news channels should be allowed to flash news items on these tickers. Everything else should be banned. It's an invasion of MY tv space. Tune into Channels like NDTV profit and u can see that the actual channel occupies only 60% of the screen. The rest of it has 

A) Flash News - If it's "flash" news why does it run in an infinite loop morning, noon and night??

B) Stock quotes - The only people who are interested in these figures are rich and successful businessmen, who do not waste their time watching tv. 

C) Weird Graphs - That allegedly originate from the adage "A picture's worth a thousand words". However, that doesn't stop the most underrated hip hop artists of our nation, the Live TV Journalist, from yapping their Acapella rhymes. 

Tickers are a great source of revenue for most of these channels that charge anywhere between 3 bucks per sms with a half hour waiting time (apparently they use Round Robin scheduling algorithm :P) to lakhs of rupees to display a commercial ad in between "flash" news during prime time. 

I am confused as to what the most irritating part about the ticker is. Is it 

(A) The speed with which they crawl putting Rahul Dravid's slow innings to shame or 

(B) The wonderful content that appears in some of these tickers

I'd go for option (B) because of the following reasons and yes its because of Slumdog Millionaire I'm bombarding this post with options (A)s and (B)s..Anyway, my point is..

MTV has a ticker that runs as slow as a John Grisham Novel minus the interest Grisham manages to generate. Those guys really think they're funny and it bemuses me as to why it has its own orkut community. 

Other Local Music Channels have their own servers where users can text and it'll be displayed on air..IF you have the patience to watch any of these channels and are an avid Dan Brown fan, you'll find a pattern in these text messages. Take a random sample of 10 such continuous text messages and analyze it. You are bound to find one of the following three messages in there. 

(A) I love you da Chellam/Ramu loves Geetha - Wouldn't it be better if these people could send their sweet nothings to each other instead of going on air? I mean in reality all they really care for is a little bit of privacy. 

Exhibit A Gandhi Mandapam

Exhibit B Children's Park

I rest my case.

(B) Thala Ajith Rockzzzz/Vijay is next superstar - Category (B) people are generally found in clusters, where a bunch of these guys will send the same message so that throughout the song being played, their message will be displayed. Now considering the kinda traffic the servers get, their timing is actually worthy of appreciation. 

(C) Cute girls call me at 9xxxx xxxxx for decent Frandship - Those godforsaken souls who throng orkut with IDs such as aarthifree4u@gmail.com

 or lovesapna@yahoo.com and are part of communities like Madras Maamis, take pride in their ability to "madakify" gaels with their superior Inglees and decentsee. 

When BBC world (now BBC world news) went for a makeover in 2004, one thing they did was abandon a PERMANENT ticker. Instead their ticker shows up only in case of Breaking news. I think that should become more of a RULE than an option. The only good that comes out of a ticker is Cricket scores. However, this is given low priority and even lesser screen space so Tendulkar becomes T'dulkar, which makes me go What the fork? Tickers??

Spot a Gentleman by the Shoes

Sometimes I wonder if i belong to some other age. I enjoy polishing my shoes. Does that tell you something about me? It ought to but don't make your judgements. Not just yet. Footwear is something that defines a person. I've always envied other kids with shinier shoes in school. A dirty shoe is kinda like going out naked. Not only are you really uncomfortable, it puts you in bad light too. I am old-school with my polishing techniques. There was a period of time in life when I wouldn't buy shoe polish. I distinctly remember myself a fourth standard kid using all sorts of home-remedies for polish, including tea-water and oil. Yes, I was that bad back then. Now I am worse. But well versed ;-) I love these puns. They're so punny. 

Yeah so to me, my shoe shouldn't be too waxy or too shiny. First thing is I am totally AGAINST those instant polishes, they ruin the leather. Wax is the best for leather. That is if you wear leather. If you don't, I suggest you hang yourself to death cuz you're losing a very impoprtant part of life. Anyways, I've listed out the algorithm I follow with which I go through to get the leather shining and not whining. 

Step 1: Tap the footwear together to get rid of sand and dust that gets stuck onto the surface. 

Step 2: Use a hard bristled brush and brush hard to get off the dust. 

Step 3: Apply wax polish, lots. Smudge it. It's okay if it looks harsh. Smudge it all over with a hard bristled brush. 

Step 4: Give extra attention to the backside and certain crevices, the crevices can get a little tricky.

Step 5: Now take a plain cloth, preferably white in color and wipe off the extra wax. 

Step 6: Now use a soft bristled brush and rub it gently on the surface. This gives you the prefect sheen. 

Now wear it with pride and watch some crazy bugger stomp your feet in the bus or at work, but hey he gives you a reason to do the same thing tomorrow. :D Worshtu. Free. 

Taxi to the dark side

IMDB Page here - http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0854678/

Torrent Download here - http://www.torrentz.com/search?q=Taxi+to+the+Dark+Side

A 1 hr 45 minute documentary that starts with the case of a Taxi driver being falsely accused of terrorism and being subject to illegal torture. From there, the movie moves on to several thousand cases of people being wrongly arrested, without the right to a fair trial, being subject to torture, both physical and 

psychological - means and methods that have been BANNED and do not conform to the Geneva Convention. 

The movie has testimonials and confessions from people wh

o were involved in inflicting this torture. The movie deals with public documents, videos and evidence that show beyond a shadow of doubt, how the American GOVERNMENT authorized the use of such illegal torture. How those at the top level of the government issued ORDERS to execute these methods of torture to prisoners who were not even accused of any crime. Innocent civilians who were arrested and tortured for no reason. 

Means of torture include:

1) Sleep Deprivation - Subject is allowed only four hours of sleep and 20 hours of interrogation (torture) everyday. After three days of sleep deprivation an average human being would lose it. Prisoners were subject to this torture for 50 days. 

2) Sensory Deprivation - Where the subject is put in an isolated chamber devoid of any light or sound. After a day or

 two of such deprivation, humans tend to start having hallucinations. 

3) Isolation

4) Stress position - A position thats uncomfortable and induces pain. Examples, the prisoners were handcuffed to the ceiling with both hands stretched fully above head handcuffed to a wire-mesh ceiling. People in such position cannot go to sleep, the moment they day, it exerts pressure on the hands and they snap back up. 

5) Forced Nudity - Culturally Iraqis and Afghans are not open to homosexuality. They are asked to strip in front of soldiers, hooded, asked to masturbate in front of an audience. Locked in stress positions with women's lingerie on their face. 

6) Playing with detainee's fears - Dogs, rats, whatever they were scared off, they were subject to torture by those same things. 

The statistics towards the end of this movie show that 83000 people have been arrested since Bush declared a war on terror. Not even a single person has had a trial.

This essentially means that if you were born in Iraq or Afghanistan, you could be arrested for ABSOLUTELY NO REASON, hooded, taken on airplanes among hundreds of other fellowmen, flown to US military facilites, subject to extreme physical and psychological torture and you would be left dead. Now take a minute to let that sink in. Your children would receive a certificate saying you were either tortured to death or killed yourself in prison. That the means and methods used on you were AUTHORIZED by the american government and they have a law that abslves them of all war crimes. Which means, no one can hold them accountable for that. This is PUBLIC information and you cant press charges against the president, 'because the President of the united states of America can authorize torture, including putting electrodes onto your ten year old son's testicles, if he deemed it necessary'.

This man here was wired up and was told that if he moved even a little, he'd be electrocuted. It was a lie but the man stood like that for a long time. 

"Forget don't try this at home. Go on and try it. Stand like that for ten minutes and see how it feels"

"People cannot bear torture beyond a point and will tell their tormenter whatever it is they think their tormenter wants to hear." 

So a confession from a prisoner from these places, which has been used as EVIDENCE to show links between Osama Bin Laden and Saddam Hussein to start the Iraq war is nothing more than a bunch of crap. 

Why did the soliders do it? Some say there were orders to put women's lingerie onto prisoner's face as they are shackled to their beds in uncomfortable positions, naked. Some say that they were not given a clear idea of rules. They would seem out of place when everyone else was doing it and they didn't. The confessions elicited from these people will be used by America to wage war again. 

The taxi driver died of torture due to repeated beatings in his leg. All the bones in his leg were "Pulpy" according to his Autopsy report and "had he lived, we would have had to amputate both his legs". 

Having your cake and eating it as well

Live Unbuttoned

Yes I remember the quote "Man was born free and everywhere he is in chains". And unbuttoned does sound remotely consistent with the thought of unchaining. But the new series of fashionwear jean introduced by Levi's is just awesome. It's a blessing in disguise. I've been to Bakya n other food outlets in and around Chennai so much in the past few months that I NEEDED to purchase size 30 pants and now even those are getting tight. My size 28 jean hardly get anywhere above my thighs. Thats as far high up as I can get them. 

Size 30 jeans do get all the way up till my hip but buttoning them is one big pain in the wrong place. Pot Belly's aren't harmful. Just take a walk down your street. I assure you, finding someone fit is pretty difficult even though people are a whole lot more fitness conscious than they used to be. They're either undernourished or overnourished. It's called the Laurel n hardy Principle. Every alternate person you meet is either too thin or too fat. That reminds me of Jay Leno's  quote on the tonight's show..

"Now there are more overweight people in America than average-weight people. So overweight people are now average… which means, you have met your New Year's resolution."

Having said that for my sole benefit, it shouldn't be that difficult in admitting the fact that I am a proud owner of one such pot-bellies. A pot that facilitates snoring and makes it difficult for me to climb stairs, bend to tie my shoe lace..In effect, this pot makes me feel like a 40 year old. 

But then buying a pair of jean is a big no-no at my place cuz my folks argue "why do you need another jean? You don't wear the ones you have." Vicious Circle, I tell you. Anywyas, thanks to the latest series of jeans by Levi's I can leave my jean unbuttoned and save myself five full minutes of huffing and puffing to get the button on. And I get to call it Fashion! That's like getting my cake and eating it too.

Mmmmm...cake..

Signed

Homer Simpson Look-alike

Wear your attitude

I think those one liners on tee's are getting boring. They're nice because they give you an excuse to stare at women's breasts but they seems to be a recession in the wisdom that tee shirt one liners used to represent.

Of late, I am considering buying a white tee and writing something myself. That's a cool way to express something and for those of you worried about bad handwriting and stuff I think you shouldn't worry. You could always call t Grunge.

Exhibit A: It took me quite some while to understand this wallpaper. My mom termed it "a blood splat from an accident". It took me two full days to realize that there was a picture of a male goat. The Intrepid Ibex if you will. So that's Grunge for you.








So maybe you can write something about a cause like STOP AIDS USE CONDOMS, advertise a worthwhile movie like Zeitgeist, simply write your number n a call me sign..something..anything.

Add a dash of originality or find a good quote, you can write just about anything draw symbols, all it takes is a plain white tee and a black fabric paint. Wear your attitude be different. Let the world make note of you when you walk by. Maybe if you do it pretty well and friends enquire bout it, u can offer to paint somethin for them n maybe just maybe u can charge them for it :P

Me? I'm planning to start rippin an old pair of jeans n draw something on it. I think it's time to give those stupid designers a run for their money. Besides I'd like my ideas on my clothes better than some wise guy's idea of "cool", "grunge" or "wise" right?

Start with pencil sketch what you want and then paint it. Black on white is fine. Military green is good for messages. Red is no-no. Yellow would be good if you want to GRAB someone's attention.

So what are u lookin at? Go get some paint homie. Cheers.

Hey yo..spin that shit up

If you find someone who has a similar taste in music, grab on to them with both hands and do not let go. 

When I was in high school, I was of the impression that all forms of western music was crap. Today I call it God. Back then I was that part of the gang who slowly slipped away when people start discussing "inglees music". Of course MTV to the rescue, I could still claim to be a fan of Eminem or Backstreet boys. 

Anyway, today, I'm finding it difficult to speak to someone bout some of the songs I like, cuz they either do not like the bands that I do or, now THEY consider it crap. See? It doesn't really matter if you do or don't listen to my kinda music but if you had the general exposure you could hold a conversation that I could place some value into. I've been yearning to hold such a conversation. 

This revelation comes in the aftermath of a guy I met on christmas. I asked him what plans he had for new year, he said BAU. Which stands for Business as Usual. "In the evenings I'm a DJ". 

I was like oh okay..I'm into music too. And then I showed some "pisthu" bombarding him with names of bands I knew (and some which I really dint know but would pass). After a while, I dropped the pretense cuz HE was the DJ not me. So I turned the "pisthu" level down and asked him:

Me: "So how's it like being a DJ?"

Him: "I play only for private parties. I still haven't gotten the opportunity to do it in a Pub or something."

Me: "So what you basically sit at the turn table and spin some shit?" (me tryin to be uber cool n soundin like a rapper dude..in retrospect I sounded more like Yuvan Shankar Raja sayin hey yo ;-))

Him: "It's complicated."

Me: "The controls or the explaining?"

Him: "No see you have two sets of players. It's a normal Audio CD player but you can play two tracks simultaneously. And you sometimes form loops. Where you can play the same line again and again."

Me: "Scratches?"

Him: "I play for private parties where the crowds are not hep. They only know the songs that they hear on tv. So I hardly do scratches because the crowds don't appreciate it. Some people cant understand the creativity of loops either."

That's outrageous isn't it? I mean not being able to hold a conversation is something you can live with, but bein a dj and playing for punks who think iron maiden is a torture device and nirvana's a bad word is just preposterous. For those of you practicing fruity loops and writing requisition letters to your princi demanding a turn table for your college, here's a tip..don't. Don't do it cuz it looks cool. Do it if you're really passionate about it. Otherwise chuck it. 

The dude was wearing a Man U tee. Me has negligible (read ZERO) knowledge bout football save a couple of games of Fifa 08. 

Me: "You are a fan of Man U? I like Arsenal."

Him: "No I don't watch much of football..I jus enjoy the game. This tee, well, Its called brtand promotion. I need to advertise that I'm a dj"

Happy new year folks